Is There An Epidemic of Hopelessness?

In the first part of our talk with NYC therapist Karol Ward she agreed that she has noticed an increase in the number of patients contacting her. Many of them seem to be doing so to discuss anxiety they are having that is related to the economy, unemployment fears, the environment (especially prompted by the terrible oil spill), and other national, rather than personal issues. We continue, below.

Welcome back, Karol. In your opinion, what is therapy able to offer patients who believe they are truly powerless to overcome the effects of living in what seems to be an increasingly polarized country? How do you suggest they cope with their fears about the negative political and economic situation?

Therapy provides the space for patients to slow down and gain perspective.  When patients feel powerless, it is often because their fear (valid or irrational), has them stuck in particular mindset or emotional state.  They see the worst and imagine the worst.  They lose sight of their own innate abilities to take charge of the areas of their life that they truly can control. 

No matter what type the therapy is, it is my belief that a therapist provides mirroring, support, reality checking, and the place to “think and feel out loud”.  I have found that helping patients complete the “incomplete picture”, meaning where they get stuck and what keeps them from moving forward, gets them back in charge.  Completing the incomplete picture has them really imagine and talk through their worst-case scenario fears, which moves it from the unknown to the known.  Usually they come to the realization that they are much more resilient than they ever imagined.

We are in the middle of a series of posts on God in Therapy with an emphasis on Western (rather than Eastern) spirituality and so we can’t resist asking the following: How do you and your patients work together to make sense of these issues? Do you or your patients ever discuss Judeo-Christian prayer, God or religion as part of the response?

I do have patients who use prayer and talk about their relationship with God as a way to handle anxiety and depression.  They attend church and talk to God as a way to find answers.  Sometimes they question their faith and relationship God when things are emotionally rough.  I have found that when they allow themselves to “feel their feelings” they are able to hear God’s voice and support more clearly.   They find great comfort in reclaiming their connection with God once more.  

We haven’t done a survey, but it seems that we have been hearing more about big-picture issues such related to the meaning of life and God and religion far more than even a few years ago.

Karol, please tell us about your new book. I think many of our readers will be interested to hear how you came to write it.

 My new book, Worried Sick: Break Free From Chronic Worry to Achieve Mental & Physical Health (Berkley, 2010), was the result of seeing how worry and anxiety was increasing in my practice.  In addition, I had my own significant worry to deal with due to the deteriorating health of my mother. 

With a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s and vascular dementia, my bright, articulate mother began to decline in what seemed to be a short period of time.  I had to use every tool I had ever used as a therapist to keep myself stable while I cared for her.  This made me contemplate what I had used in my practice to help my patients combat and manage their worries.  I found it interesting that writing my book would be parallel to the journey I was having with my mom. 

As a therapist who really believes in the importance of the body-mind connection, I know that addressing how worry effects us on the physical, psychological and behavioral level is a key to making changes.  I wanted to offer the techniques that I had seen reduce worry and anxiety with my patients.

Using a body, mind, spirit approach was important because in my experience they are related.  When the body is relaxed, the mind is affected and when the mind is clear, we are open to the possibilities of life, which helps our spirit.  In turn, having a spiritual life helps us feel better in our mental outlook and that in turn helps us feel less physically tense.  Everything is interrelated.  I wanted to have readers remember that when they got worried all they had to focus on what the three C’s.  Calmness, Clarity and Community.  

Calmness-Using techniques that help release physical and mental tension.

Clarity-Utilizing the logic of the mind to address irrational fears.

Community-Tapping into the people and recourses that offer ongoing support when you are worried and anxious. 

These three Cs are quite important, Karol. Upon reflection it seems that everybody finds one of these comes more naturally to them than the others but all of them must be explored and cultivated. In big cities such as NY, the third one, Community, is often a real challenge for people.

The purpose of my book was to not condemn worry because it will always be part of our lives.   Rather my goal was to offer guidance and solutions so that readers can get unstuck, find support and keep going when worrisome situations enter their lives.   

 Thank you.

About Karol Ward Karol Ward, L.C.S.W. is a licensed psychotherapist, nationally recognized speaker and the author of Worried Sick (Berkley, 2010) and Find Your Inner Voice (Career Press, 2009).  Karol combines her training as a psychotherapist with her passion for communication and has appeared as a psychological media expert on CNN, NBC, ABC, and in magazines such as Cosmopolitan, Experience Life, Black Enterprise, Readers Digest , Idea Fitness Journal and The New York Daily News.  She has also been featured on MSNBC.com, Sheknows.com, DivineCaroline.com and the Examiner.com as well as numerous radio shows.  The core of her work is the importance of the body.